Ilsun-nim draft
By Yujin Pak
Ilsun-nim – mother, teacher, inspirer.
Ilsun-nim was the greatest spiritual influence in my early life. Through
her love for what is higher, she inspired me as a child to love and pursue what
is higher. Through her I learned of the true spirit of Mother God.
Early on, she taught me about aligning with higher power and serving
humanity. These were her two great teachings to me through my youth and
childhood. She did this through stories, sayings and the example of her own
living.
As I was growing up, she told me many stories—stories that she loved,
stories of greatness, of mastery, of love of truth, stories of aligning with
higher power and of service to humanity. These stories were wondrous to me and
filled me with a passion to follow after the people in the stories. Thus began
my own spiritual quest and journey as a young boy, inspired by her love and by
her stories. The story of that quest as it unfolded in my life, I will tell
another time perhaps.
What are some qualities about her that stand out to me? She had a deep and
unshakeable trust in life. She was fearless and optimistic about life while
being practical and astute in small things. She loved her father, her country,
humanity. She herself served in simple ways—in simple actions of generosity,
courage, trust and selflessness, in the constancy of her thoughts and prayers,
in her love of learning. She has kept her faith in the great potential of
humanity.
As a child, I felt very close to her and proud of her. She was my champion,
my mother and teacher. Today, she is a great friend and companion to me. It has
been and is a great privilege to walk this life with Ilsun-nim—a life of shared
purpose and service.
Influence of Family Positioning and History
in the Telling of this Story
Before speaking more of my story of Ilsun-nim, it seems important to say
something about the nature of my relationship with her in the context of the
family history. I realize that my experience of her and thus my story of her is
significantly affected by a privileged experience I had in the family. As a
last and late baby, arriving in a time of long awaited stability and prosperity
in the family after the ending of the Korean War, I was particularly showered
with love from the whole family. Also, by the time I was born, family
circumstances had changed in such a way that Ilsun-nim had more time to mother
and mentor me than she had with her other children. This was particularly so
during our immigrant years in Brazil ,
which were key formative years of pre-adolescence for me, between nine and
thirteen. She was in a new country without friends, as all of us in the family
were. Her other children had to work to help out the family. In the meantime,
she and I were company to each other and she had opportunity to commune with me
and mentor me. It’s apparent that these and other factors allowed a depth of
communion and mentoring to take place between her and me that did not have a
chance to occur in the same way for the others. Thus, my story of her is unique
to both the special gift of love that I received from the whole family, as well
as the particular mentoring that I received from her.
Yes you can
One of my brightest memories of Ilsun-nim and her greatest personal gift to
me is captured in the following story. It is a story of her trust in me and her
trust in life.
One day when I was eight years old, I was to go hiking with a school friend
and his father up Baegoondae, a mountain at the outskirts of Seoul . When I arrived there by bus, my friend
and his father weren’t there. In a quandary, I wondered what I should do. I
thought may be I should go back home, but I had come all the way out here and
the mountain looked inviting. I decided to go up the mountain and found that
people were very friendly, encouraging and willing to share their lunch with
me. Having hiked to the top of the mountain, and on the way back home on the
bus, I began to realize that mother might not be happy that I did this by
myself. When she asked me how it went, I worried that I might get scolded but
told the story. She looked at me for a moment and then with a smile of pride
praised me for being brave. I still carry with me the feeling and spirit of that
moment. The feeling of pride, of being deeply trusted and loved. This memory
has stayed with me since, as a memory of heaven’s trust and love of me. Thank
you, Ilsun-nim, for this gift.
This memory is linked in my consciousness with another memory later, when I
began university and started to do whitewater canoeing. Whitewater canoeing is
considered a potentially dangerous sport. When I told her of it, she showed no
concern and seemed pleased about it. Being trusting of life and of herself, she
trusted me. Being adventurous herself, she welcomed adventurous spirit in me. A
few years later, when I was on a two week whitewater kayaking adventure with
friends, canoeing many of the rivers in Pennsylvania ,
I stopped at a kayak store by a river. The store was selling a postcard of a
capsized kayak with the bottom above water. On the kayak bottom were the words,
written large, “I’M OK MOM.” I bought the postcard and sent it to Ilsun-nim,
thinking it would make her smile.
This spirit of trust and adventure led me to a life long love of outdoor
exploration, wilderness canoeing, rafting, climbing, snorkeling. It also led to
my work, in my twenties, with the famous outdoor leadership training program,
the Outward Bound schools, and on to winning a Rhodes Scholarship to Oxford University . Since
Rhodes Scholars were chosen for leadership abilities plus academic abilities,
my experience with outdoor leadership and teaching in Outward Bound schools was
an important part of qualifying for the scholarship. In my memory, Ilsun-nim’s pride
in me as the eight year boy returning from Baegoondae mountain was the strength,
the wind beneath my wings, that led me to wilderness exploration, Outward Bound,
Rhodes Scholarship, and onwards.
Be an Eager Learner Responsive to the Truth
There are many life lessons that I learned from Ilsun-nim. One of the most
important and fundamental life lessons she taught me was about being an eager
learner responsive to the truth. This meant revering and learning from the
wisdom, mastery, and wholeness of character of others. She taught me this, as
well as many other things, through her own example as well as through her
words.
Ilsun-nim had a eager learner’s heart. A willing heart. A responsive heart.
She had a reverence for wisdom and mastery wherever she found it and was an
eager student. This began for her while she was a young teenager sitting with
her father at meal times. Her father was a man of character, wisdom and vision.
She loved and revered him and eagerly listened to all he had to say. She spent
time with her father in this way from age 13 to 18. This formed in her an
attitude of reverence towards all people of wisdom, and an eager readiness to
learn.
This readiness to learn showed itself in many ways in her adult life. One
of them was in her attitude towards immigrant life. Before immigrating to Brazil she read
a Japanese novel, “Wave,” about immigrating to a new country. She read in the
novel about the fact that life in the new country would begin at the very
bottom. She internalized this lesson and left on the ship to Brazil with an
attitude of ease and welcome for the hardship that her new life would bring.
How much harder would her, and our, lives have been had she not willingly
learned and prepared herself in this way. Being ready, she had an attitude of
adventure and pioneering.
Later, her readiness to learn showed itself in her eager learning from many
important sources of wisdom that she came across. She was often adventurous and
daring in learning, as well as humble. She learned from many people, books as
well as an amazing range of seminars and workshops. Some of these, in the form
of spiritual and personal development seminars, included the Emissaries,
Avatar, Emotional Healing, Dahn, Won Buddhism, Dongsasup, Unification Church ,
Jehova’s Witness, Ki Healing, and many more.
She spoke to me about being an eager, and open student wherever one is. The
first part of this was about revering and learning from people of genuine mastery
and wisdom. I will speak of this more later. The second part was about being without
pre-judgment or prejudice. Such lessons instilled in me an openness to wisdom
no matter through whom such might come. Prejudice kills learning and keeps people
stupid. Her teaching of unprejudiced openness and humility before the truth was
one of the greatest gifts that she gave me as a youth. Such attitude to
learning allowed the rest of my learning to take place.
She spoke of one other thing, in conjunction with having a willing and
eager heart. She spoke also of being astute about things and people. A heart
gentle as the dove, and a mind wise as the serpent. What wise teaching this was
to the young and eagerly growing boy.
I recall her telling me the following as a child: “There are those who hear
one thing and learn ten things. And there are those who hear ten things and
learn nothing.” The unspoken question was “Which do you wish to be?” To the
eager boy, there was no question which he wished to be!
Another lesson about a willing and eager heart came in the form of a Judo
movie that she took me to when I was around 11 years old in Brazil . In this
time period, she often took me to movies that had a spiritual message and shared
with me afterwards about the meaning of them. I absorbed these movies and what we
shared about them, eagerly. This particular movie was about the spiritual and
physical training of Sugata Sanshiro under Judo founder and master, Yano. In
the movie, young Sanshiro, along with other village boys, comes to the Judo
master asking to be taught Judo. The master tells them to sweep the fallen
leaves and the yard. The boys excitedly do the chores and ask the master, “Will
you teach us now?” The master tells them to return the next day. They are a bit
disappointed but eagerly return the next day only to do the same chores again.
This goes on day after day, until only Sanshiro remains, continuing to do the
chores until he has proven his deep desire to learn. The lesson of this movie
scene was deeply imprinted in my young mind and formed a thrilling preparation
of heart to accept rigorous training in order to learn.
Express Excellence Where you Are
Another important lesson she taught me was about excellence. Express
excellence, express your best wherever you are, as you are. Four stories come
to mind that she told me as I was growing up that imprinted this philosophy
deeply in me.
The first two stories are from her time working as an immigrant laborer in Brazil and in Canada . They are stories of
expressing excellence in all circumstances. In Korea , she had worked as a teacher
and as a company manager and had not worked as a physical laborer before.
Having immigrated, it was necessary for her to work as a laborer. Her first such
work was as a seamstress in Brazil .
She had never done seamstress work before but learned quickly and excelled in
it. For two years, before her husband arrived from Korea ,
she was able to keep the family going on this basis and continued until we left
Brazil to immigrate to Canada . Then,
once in Canada ,
she soon found work in a hospital kitchen as a laborer and food deliverer.
While, again, she was not used to such physical work, she had the philosophy of
giving her best in all circumstances and strove to bring excellence in her
work. These two stories from her life, of expressing the best in all
circumstances, stirred in me my own desire to do my best in all circumstances.
The two other stories also left an indelible impression on me. One was
about personal clothing. She told me in our early immigrant time, that when in
modest circumstance and lacking money, one’s clothing didn’t need to be fancy
or many. That, an item of clothing plain and well worn but mended with love and
taken care of can express true dignity and being. This left in me a deep
imprint about the true genesis of fineness and excellence—that they lay not in outer
appearance but in the quality of true character and care expressed through the
form or appearance.
Another story about true character and excellence that she told me was
about a famous writer in Korean history whose mother’s mastery in her modest
work humbled her young and already accomplished son to greater excellence and
mastery. This too left a deep impression in me. Ilsun-nim told me that this
mother had sent her son to Seoul
to study and he achieved great success after a few years and came back to visit
her. She had sold rice cakes to support him to study in Seoul . When he came back proud of his
achievement in calligraphy, she sat him down and proposed a test. She would
turn the candle light out in the house and each would do their task—she would
cut rice cake as was her job, and he would write calligraphy. When they did and
the light was turned on, her cake was cut perfectly but his calligraphy was
poor. She had achieved mastery in her task; he had only achieved superficial
excellence. She sent him back to Seoul .
Humbled, he studied more deeply and achieved true mastery. This was the story
about Han Seok Bong. The story left in me the awareness that there is such a
thing as true mastery, beyond superficial accomplishment; also that it can be
attained even in ordinary stations in life and that they carry great value.
Upon my departure to Oxford
at 25, she reminded me of the story and to do well there.
Prayer of Mother God
Around my first Christmas at Oxford ,
in 1979, Ilsun-nim wrote me the following in a letter: “It is your mother’s
deep prayer that at the same time that you learn much in a good environment,
you train your body also and become a worthy leader of sound spirit and body
and become a light to searching humanity.” As I kept the words and the spirit
of her prayer in my heart, I felt in them such deep longing and compassion for paining
humanity and recognized in them the longing and prayer of Mother God for the
plight of her children. This brought such deep and continued flow of tears in
my heart, and repentance also, for having been so unaware heretofore. Even as I
write now, 30 years later, I hear the longing and prayer of Mother God, to all
who can hear: “Awake, arise. Be strong. Be true. Be a light. Be a true answer
to paining humanity.”
While Ilsun-nim’s prayer was of one mother to her son, I heard in it the
deeper prayer of Mother God to her awakening sons and daughters, and in that
deeper prayer, also the hidden countless prayer of the heart of humanity:
“Awake, rise, be strong, be true. Be a light unto humanity.” In May 1980, I
wrote a poem in answer to this prayer, titled “I Heard Your Secret Prayer, I
Heard.” In it I wrote: “Great Woman so passionate, loving and true. How could I
to your wish be untrue?” My life since has been lived as an answer to that
prayer. How could I indeed, to your wish be untrue? As I write this, I also ask
those who shall read this: “How could you—you, true son, true daughter—to your
Mother’s prayer be untrue? Come join with me in answering her prayer. Be the
light.
I Heard your secret prayer, I heard
I heard your secret
prayer, I heard,
my passionate
mother, so loving and true.
In your gentle eyes
in whose depths I
learned to cast away
the doubts and fears
of a childish heart,
I heard,
your silent prayer,
your eternal prayer,
that your one
longing should come true.
Through all those
years
I longed to fill
your heart with my love,
and listened to your
prayer as best as I could.
I won you trophies
and prizes, and honors
as all mothers
should have been proud.
But, your secret
prayer went on, steadfast, and singular,
that your one
longing should come true.
What longing should
be so deep
that no earthly
honor could fulfill?
What promise so, so
precious
that you would die
in waiting,
than to it be
untrue?
Mother, so
passionate, loving and true.
What will should be
so strong
that you would bear
the longing of all mankind?
What compassion so
deep
that your one wish
should be,
for all men to be
set free?
Great Woman, so
passionate, loving and true.
How could I, to your
wish, be untrue?
****************
That the promise is
so precious, never, never doubt.
Believe that destiny
was in your prayer,
and your prayer in
destiny,
for in the hours of
fulfillment you will know
that your prayer was
held, inscribed in eternity.
****************
Woman, so
passionate, loving and true.
Do you remember that
day when I was little,
when you told me the
story of the little boy,
who in believing and
waiting for a legend to come true,
grew into its
fulfillment?
What design moved
you to tell such stories?
He went up to the
village hill everyday, you told me,
from where he could
see the prophecy’s remains
carved on a lonely
cliff face, waiting, waiting...
He, too, waited,
hearing the sighs in
the hearts of villagers poor,
his uncles,
grandmothers and medicine men, too,
waiting, waiting, on
a lonely vigil for hope.
Destiny is in
prayer, and prayer in destiny.
He too prayed,
watched, and waited,
steadfastly as the
years went by.
People changed,
seasons passed,
yet his faith held,
his understanding
growing deeper
as his compassion
transmuted into stillest center.
One day, in sitting
by the pond, by the lonely cliff,
as he looked,
emptied of desire, of hope, into mirror water,
in that moment held
inscribed in eternity, he saw
that the prophesied
man of wisdom, had already come.
Woman of great
faith.
Do you remember now
of the prayer within that story,
within your secret
prayer,
within the prayer in
the hearts of all good men?
Invocations, within
invocations, within invocations.
Woman of great
faith,
recognize in me the
harvest of your devotional sowing,
for I Am your
faith’s incarnation
grown by the power
of your invocations.
***********************
All good men and
women, hear:
That the promise is
so precious, never, never doubt.
Neither pray, nor
wish lightly,
for in your prayers
and wishes is inscribed, destiny.
Hear the prayers in
hearts of other good men,
for by the power of
their invocations
your will is
cleansed
to be at one with
God’s will. May 12, 1980
Reverence for Greatness of Character—Upward
Orientation
If Ilsun-nim’s greatest personal gift to me as a child was her trust in me,
her greatest spiritual gift to me was her example of upward
orientation—orientation in higher character and spirit. I cannot think of her
separately from her orientation in greatness of character, in Spirit. This was
conveyed to me from early on through her stories about her father and the
reverence that she had for him as well as for others that were of true
character. Seeing the Japanese, spiritually based martial arts movies with her
in my childhood, was one way that her love and reverence for spirit was
conveyed to me.
I loved her and looked up to her and naturally absorbed her upward
orientation. The practical effect of this in my teens and twenties was that I
was naturally open and responsive to people of greater experience and wisdom.
Thus, I naturally came to have a progression of mentors from whom I learned
through those years. My reverence for my grandfather, learned through Ilsun-nim,
was the cornerstone of this early upward orientation. This prepared me for
other key mentors that would come into my life.
Another story she told me when I was little that left a lasting imprint in
my consciousness was the story of the Great Stone Face. I learned later that
the story was not Korean but written by Nathaniel Hawthorne, the famous
American writer. While writing this article, I asked Ilsun-nim how she knew all
the many wonderful stories she had told me as a child. She said because she
loved reading all her life. Obviously, I was greatly blessed by her love of
reading. Even now she is an avid reader. When I called her today, she was
reading the autobiography of Moon Sun Myung. She called it very fine.
As for the Great Stone Face, hearing the story of the little boy who in
loving and waiting for the prophesized wise man to come grew into him, left a
sense of wonder in me as a young boy. Maybe I will pray and grow into a
wonderful wise man like the man in mother’s story.
Mastery & Aligning with Universal Power
I absorbed from Ilsun-nim many stories about developing mastery and
aligning with universal power. Obviously, these were stories that she loved and
filled her with interest. So they came to fill me with a sense of wonder and
awe also. The time period when she told me these stories would have been
between 1964 and 1969, particularly, when I was between 9 to 14. She would have
been 37 to 42. These stories had an impact on my attitude towards discipline,
training, personal competence and the ultimate goal of such. These stories spoke
of rigorous discipline that leads to mastery, which leads to oneness with
universal power. It seems some of her awareness of such a process of mastery
and alignment came with her conversations with her father. In other ways,
perhaps, this was an innate inclination in her from her youth.
Stories
Seeing With Spiritual Sight: One
story was about her father and his gift for finding gold and other minerals as
a miner. Upon being asked by a disciple about his gift for finding gold, he
said “People see with their physical eyes. I see with my spirit.” Ilsun-nim was
aware of her father’s practice of zen meditation at home and of his visit to
Buddhist temples to rest and meditate. This story stayed with me always. “It is
possible to have not only physical sight but spiritual sight.” This was an
important early seed towards my own spiritual awakening. Later, as my interest
turned to finding, not physical gold in the land, but the spiritual gold in
people, this story came to have yet more meaning. We see the gold, the inmost
angel in people, through the purity of our spiritual sight.
A Cat and Perfect Flow: One other early
story about mastery and mastership that came to me was from a movie that Ilsun-nim
took me to about the founder of Judo. This would have been around 1966 when I
was about 11. In the story, the founder gains one of his inspiration for judo
from watching a cat fall from the ceiling rafters, spin in the air and land
gently on all four legs. From this he derived insight about alignment with life
flow and the inner state of relaxation that allows it. In my adult life, I came
to increasingly understand the full meaning of this, and of aligning
consciously with the universal creative flow. I became increasingly aware that
there is providence, intelligence and hidden design to the unfolding of life
for those who care to become aware of it and align with it. Ilsun-nim became
increasingly conscious of this invisible and intelligent design of life and has
sought to live in alignment with it. Her coming to Korea at 84 was in obedience to her
inner sensing of life’s flow and aligning with it.
The Swordsman and Satori: Another story was
the story of Miyamoto Musashi, a legendary Japanese samurai, as told in a movie
that Ilsun-nim took me to and later had me read as a book. This story had a
lasting impact on me as well. I too wanted to train in mastery and attain
universal alignment, satori. After the movie or the reading of the book, she
would talk to me about the themes of the story and these conversations too set
a direction and course for my life.
These stories were unspeakably wondrous stories to a precocious and
responsive young boy! They led to him to love mastery and pursue the
development of mastery in a number of arenas. The first of such was in table
tennis. An inspired twelve year old boy wanted to learn swordsmanship and
become a zen swordsman. But they didn’t teach swordsmanship in Brazil .
So instead, he trained in table tennis for several years.
The Butcher and the Tao: One of the stories
she told also was the story of a butcher who was a master. (I learned recently
that this is the well known story by ZhuangZi). He used his knife in such a way
that he cut the space between the bone and the meat; his knife never dulled,
and his work of perfect skill was enlightened art, an expression of the Tao, an
expression of the Way. In telling me this story, she spoke to me that one can
attain universal alignment, the tao, through any skill that is useful to master
and that once attained it is transferrable to other skills and uses. She
stressed this a number of times and this became deeply imprinted for me. For a
boy who couldn’t find anyone to teach him swordsmanship this was a welcome
notion. He could take up a different practice and attain perfect skill and the
tao through that.
My Experiment with Table Tennis and other practices: The
field that the young boy had available as an immigrant in Brazil and Canada was table tennis, something
that he gave all his devotion to for four years and reached a high level of
mastery. This training led him to a key peak-experience. The experience was in
a tournament where, against all odds, he beat the US Junior table tennis champion.
More important than the victory was his experience of perfect inner alignment
during the match. In moments during the match, he felt as though he was playing
in slow motion, in perfect flow, as though the power of life itself was playing
through him and he was a channel. This experience of alignment and perfect flow
stayed with him as he went on beyond table tennis to other fields of mastery. Ilsun-nim
was right. The knowing of perfect flow was transferrable, even in the limited
range he had come to know at the age of seventeen. Later I applied this knowing
and essence to, whitewater canoeing, fencing, philosophy, emotional healing,
and other fields that came to me to master. Her gift to me in the form of this
early teaching and preparation was so significant to my unfolding life. I came
into each field of skill or endeavor with the attitude of developing mastery
and expressing the highest flow. Ultimately, this cumulative experience and
knowing of flow led to my spiritual awakening at age 25 and the further
refining of that awakening and inner alignment afterwards.
There are many practical sayings about mastery that she communicated to me
when I was young, which became a part of my young consciousness. Some of these
were:
“A master captain docks
his ship so it’s aligned to easily exit the harbor.”
“A boy going to school
without a pencil is like a soldier going to war without a gun.”
“When the rice stalk is
young it’s proud and straight. When it is mature and full
of experience, it bows and is humble.”
“In all work, there is a
knack and essence. They allow you to do the most with least
effort. Learn that.”
These are wonderful sayings for a young mind. For years now, I have taken
people out on outdoor outings and have taken extra clothing and items for them
that often turn out to be essential for their experience. People have
appreciated and marveled at this. It comes straight from Ilsun-nim’s
lessons!
One With the Great Universal Sea
One of Ilsun-nim’s most notable and life long experience is that of oneness
and communion with nature and with universal life. She grew up as one with
nature and the sea in the small fishing village of Yong Jam
near Ulsan .
In her backyard in Toronto in her later
life she built a garden sanctuary that expressed her communion with universal
life and attracted both countless neighborhood birds as well as neighbors that
were inspired to imitate her. This love of nature, ocean and water, she also
passed on to me. My lifelong love of outdoor exploration, canoeing in the
wildest northern wilderness of Canada ,
exploring by kayak deserted islands in Mexico
and the Caribbean, rafting the rivers of Colorado ,
started with her passing on her love of life and of nature. When Ilsun-nim was
82 years old and before she became older, my wife Marsha and I took her to one
of the most pristine, beautiful and unpopulated islands in the Caribbean Sea
so that she could enjoy the sea that she loved so much. On this tiny island
with the most beautiful underwater coral imaginable, she snorkeled with us
among the countless colorful fishes. She felt completely at home in that water
as we swam together amidst the underwater garden. This was a small way for me
to give back to her the gift of love of nature and the spirit of adventure that
she had given me. Nowadays, living together on Jeju island, we often go out on
ocean side outings. Sometime she still goes kayaking with us although her age
is catching up with her now. It’s amazing that only three years ago, at age 85,
she climbed to the top of Halla Mountain !
Last year, she kayaked with a group of us to a small island (one kilometer
offshore) near Hamduk, on Jeju
Island . She is still
adventurous!
A Phone Call of Love – Selfless Giving
One day, around 1995?, while I was living in Colorado ,
USA ,
Ilsun-nim phoned me and said she wanted to share something. She said that she
had considered carefully and had decided to give us a part of our inheritance
early. She explained that all she had to give us upon her death was her house.
But, this might not happen for a long time since she was so healthy and might
live a long time. She added that each of us had gotten a very late financial
start because of immigrating twice and beginning each time with so little support.
And she realized that now was the time when each of us could use the
inheritance the most as we were struggling to get established and started in
our paths. She said she had made the decision to take out a loan from the bank
by mortgaging her house. She would divide the 200,000 Canadian Dollar loan so
that she could give a portion to each of us. She believed that this would give
us courage and help us move forward and would be a more effective use of the
money than after her death. Hearing this, I felt the depth of her care and wisdom
and wept. How great a love this was. Far more than the money, I felt the
greatness of her love and her sacrifice. I thanked her and vowed to myself that
I would use this golden substance of her love to an end worthy of the greatness
of it. To this day, tears roll down my cheeks in remembering her phone call and
her act of love.
How wise, giving and powerful a use of her financial substance this was. Ilsun-nim
is a daughter worthy of her father, Li Jong Man, who too, gave so wisely,
selflessly and with such greatness of vision so that Korea and her people might live. Because
of the great way he used his wealth for the blessing of others, it was said of
her him that people were sorry that he was not yet more wealthy than he was. Limited
by her immigrant circumstances, Ilsun-nim, like her father, still found ways to
give that were of the maximum use of her resources.
A Pool of Sadness in Her Heart
Sometime when I was little, I saw Ilsunim crying quietly in her room. I
don’t remember now the exact incident, except that when I was in my twenties, I
remembered it vividly enough to write of it in a poem. Some of her tears were
likely from the pain of her marriage, some of it may have been the hardship of
the immigrant life, some of it her compassion for the sorrow of the Korean
people. Perhaps, in this pain she also felt the pain of the heart of this
world. I felt the sadness in her and wrote the following words.
“My only mother, selfless mother
If you could only sing my joy would know no bounds.
But caged birds do not sing.
O mother dear you would not sing
Because your beloved father knew the truth.
A people without a nation do not sing,
like caged birds they do not sing.”
While Korea
was without nationhood under Japanese domination, so was it not yet a full
nation while torn and divided.
Prayer for Korea ’s Gift to the World – Gift
Born of Sorrow Overcome with Love
Ilsun-nim felt deeply the sorrow of Korea —a people and nation enslaved
by colonization, broken by war, torn by division, silenced by dictatorship, and
healing only now from the scars of so much sorrow. While South Korea has
progressed with blinding speed economically into the ranks of the first world,
Ilsunim has had the prophetic vision that Korea has another yet more
extraordinary gift to give the world which is a greater miracle than it’s
economic achievement. That gift is the gift of the birthing of a new nation, a
nation not only unifying itself economically and politically but daring to give
birth to a new kind of model and moral nation—one befitting the evolution and
aspiration of humanity in the 21st century, a moral nation based on
principles of co-prosperity and compassion.
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